How to Fix a Broken Slayer
by TheBear
Summary: Femslash, Someone has to break Buffy out of her repugnant, self-hating, spike-habit. Maybe an old-flame? Er, not exactly... Rated M for safety...I would call it borderline T.


'Could this day get any weirder?' Buffy thought, having to suppress the urge to laugh. Right now, laughter might end in hysterics.

Her mind wandered as she walked through the stillness of the graveyard. Only the sound of her feet shuffling through the grass disturbed the silence.

'One minute I'm scraping grease off of the grill at the DMP, the next I'm hunting a demon with Riley Finn! Yes folks, my ex is back...oh and he brought his wife! Then, as if things weren't already messed up, he sent me on patrol with her!' the Slayer thought, franticly confused by this turn of events.

'Here I am, pleasantly numb and unfeeling as normal, and he walks in to see me in my lovely orange uniform...the man I loved. The man I chased and was too late to stop from leaving. The man I obsessed about for months afterward; and I felt...' Buffy's mind went silent as she tried to remember the feelings Riley's return had provoked.

Several paces later she had nothing. 'Nothing. All that drama, and I barely managed to feel anything except embarrassed. Even that wasn't much of a feeling. Lately all I feel is...empty.'

'I think I'm really messed up,' Buffy thought. 'I just wish I could care about it.'

Shaking her head to leave that subject behind, Buffy shot a sidelong glance at Sam Finn, Riley's wife, walking silently next to her. 'Well, he definitely traded up in the looks department!' she thought. 'I should be jealous, I guess. I'm not sure why, though.'

Buffy let her eyes trail up and down the black spandex covered form, taking in the slim waist above a graceful heart-shaped backside. High on her torso, Sam's breasts were round and full despite the skin-tight outfit. Her neck was long and slender, and her face belonged on a supermodel, not a demon hunter. 'She really is beautiful,' Buffy thought, sensing some reaction in her body, though she didn't recognize what it might be.

"Thanks for letting me tag along," Sam said, breaking the silence.

"No problem," Buffy answered casually.

"Maybe not for you" Sam replied. "I gotta tell you, Buffy, I'm a little bit intimidated. I mean, patrolling with the real live Slayer, you're like...Santa Claus, or Buddha, or something–"

Buffy raised an eyebrow in surprise and quipped, "Fat and jolly?"

Sam shook her head. "Legendary...it's not just Slayer status I'm talking about, either. It's you," she said with a high degree of intensity in her voice.

A very slight tingle of some indefinable emotion stirred in the Slayer, and she asked, "Riley talks about me?"

Sam looked away, saying, "He didn't say anything for a long time, I could tell, though. He was ripped up inside."

'Oh, and how do I feel about that?' Buffy wondered to herself. 'Shouldn't I feel guilty, or sad or something?' When no answer came to her, she shrugged and said, "Good thing he has you."

"More like miraculous," Sam replied. "I went down to Central America with the Peace Corps. One night, my entire infirmary got slaughtered by–" she paused, shaking her head. "I didn't know what they were. I got saved, quit the Corps, joined the squad. My first firefight, I met Riley." Sam smiled, apparently remembering the event fondly. "We started talking...you know, first about tactics, missions, stuff like that...then, eventually, about you–"

"He thinks...I let him go." Buffy said hesitantly. 'Why did I say that?' she wondered.

Sam stopped and turned to the Slayer with a questioning look. "Do you wish you hadn't?" she asked.

'Do I?' Buffy wondered the same thing herself. After a moment of consideration with no new answers, she softly replied, "I wish things were different. I-I'm not trying to...I don't...uh, you know–" she trailed off.

'Well, that sounded convincing. She probably thinks I'm after her hubby now...' Buffy thought and resumed walking.

Sam said, "I didn't mean to put you on the spot, Buffy. There's no bad guys in this one. The only thing that could...help Riley work it out was time. Lots of time. Took him a year to get over you."

"I'm glad he's over me," Buffy said. 'I think I am...am I? Do I care either way?' she mused.

They walked for a minute in silence before Sam asked, "So, you seeing anyone new? Someone special?"

'That's a laugh,' Buffy thought, though she felt no humor on the subject. 'Seeing someone? If seeing someone means having violent, meaningless sex with someone, then I guess I am. Special? No.' Out loud, Buffy stammered, "You know, I just wanna take my time, you know, I don't...I don't wanna jump right into anything, don't wanna...you know...be defined by who I'm with."

Sam nodded her head, agreeing, "Yeah, better no guy than the wrong guy, that's for sure."

'Well, this conversation is nicely depressing,' Buffy thought. The only feeling that she had been experiencing lately suddenly came to the fore. 'Great! As if I needed a reminder about how empty my life is...'

Buffy abruptly turned to her companion and said, "Sam. You know what? Um, I think we should split up."

Sam's shoulder slumped, and she hung her head slightly as she responded, "Oh, I'm slowing you down. I knew I would, this was just selfish of me."

Buffy automatically tried to reassure her. "No, it's not, uh...there's this guy, uh, an informant...thing is, he's kinda twitchy. I show up with company, and, and we get nothing."

Sam's smile looked somewhat forced as she said, "Cool. I'm guessing Finn needs me about now." She looked around, adding, "He's probably off somewhere gettin' his ass kicked." Her grin was more convincing as she began to back away, saying, "You know how wild he gets. Hey, don't worry about Rye and me, we're good."

'Yeah, I noticed,' Buffy thought as she stood for a moment, eyes drawn to the demon hunter's swaying bottom as she walked off.

'I need...' she thought, feeling the emptiness acutely. 'I need...' Her mind refused to supply the answer; however, her body must have had some idea, as it turned from the retreating woman and began to head off in a specific direction.

Buffy wasn't surprised to find herself standing outside the door to Spike's crypt. 'Why would I be? I told Sam I needed to get information. That's why I'm here...for information.' she lied to herself.

Buffy slammed the door open and strode in, taking in the scene. Spike was sitting on top of a coffin reading a book. The coffin was the closest thing he had to a couch; it had a blanket covering it and a throw-pillow on it.

"Buffy, hey now," Spike said, making a show of slowly and deliberately putting down his book and rising to his feet. "If I'da known you were coming, I'da baked a cake," he quipped, wearing his trademark sneering grin.

'Need...' Buffy thought as she walked over to stand in front of him. Pulling off her black gloves, she stated, "I need information."

Spike's grin grew wider as he answered, "Well, suppose I could be helpful. If the price is right." His eyes followed her hands as she set her gloves down. "I'm not sure I'm selling out at Double Meat Palace wages, though."

'I need...' Buffy's mind was stuck on that unfinished idea. Continuing the charade, Buffy said, "I need to find a guy. Dealer. Calls himself The Doctor."

Spike's grin was replaced with a more serious look. He asked, "Human?"

"His traffic isn't." Buffy answered,

"Clock ticking?" Spike continued.

Nodding her head, Buffy said, "Whatever he's doing, he's doing it soon."

Spike's grin returned. He took a moment to run his eyes up and down her body before speaking in a low, seductive voice, "Soon? Not just yet though?

'I Need!' Buffy's mind shouted. She just stared at him for several moments before quietly speaking. "Tell me you love me," she demanded, her eyes welling up with moisture.

Spike looked surprised by her words. "I love you. You know I do," he said in a reassuring voice.

Buffy stepped closer, her mind was demanding that she fill herself, satisfy her need; though she couldn't define what it was, exactly. She whispered harshly, "Tell me you want me."

Spike whispered in reply, "I always want you. In point of fact–"

Buffy interrupted, "Shut up." She reached up and hooked her hand around his neck, pulling him down on top of her, onto the coffin.

She began unbuttoning his shirt, while Spike pulled at the fastenings on her body armor. She stared at his face, thinking, 'I need this...' even though she didn't feel anything other than empty. She pulled his half-way unbuttoned shirt down over his shoulders, then used it to pull him down towards her for a kiss.

She had the barest sensation of his cold, lifeless lips against her own when the sound of the crypt door slamming open caused her to push him away violently.

"This is your...informant?" Sam's angry voice filled the room.

Buffy sat up, causing Spike to fall awkwardly to the floor.

"Hey!" he shouted, sounding enraged. He jumped to his feet and shrugged his shirt back over his shoulders. "You know this bird?" he asked.

Buffy felt the tears on her face as she stared at her ex-lovers wife. 'I don't even know why I'm crying,' she thought. 'I don't feel sad...just...empty.'

"Buffy, talk to me...Please!" the tone of Sam's voice had dropped and her face radiated sympathy.

"Look, Ms. whoever you are; Piss off! Me and the Slayer, we gots some business to attend to," Spike said, his voice filled with braggadocio.

Buffy barely heard him, and it seemed like Sam didn't hear him at all. 'Oh God! Her eyes!' Buffy thought as her gaze was captured.

Buffy's heart began to beat a little faster as the lithe figure slowly approached her.

"Ohh, so it's like that is it?" Spike suddenly crowed. "Well, if the Slayer's game, I'm always up for a little threeway!"

Spike's voice was like a distant echo in Buffy's mind. Her attention was exclusively focused on the ice-blue gaze that was caressing her face like the touch of a lover.

"Why would you ever let a thing like that touch you?" Sam asked softly.

"Hey! There's no call for personal attacks, now!" Spike complained indignantly.

'Oh God,' Buffy thought, feeling a tendril of warmth creep through her loins. 'What is that? I haven't felt anything like that since...since...'

"Tell me why Buffy?" Sam's gentle question carried no malice or anger, only compassion and caring.

"I...I need–" Buffy trailed off, unable to reduce it to human language. Her breathing was growing deeper, and the warmth was slowly increasing through her center at the way Sam was staring at her. 'She looks...hungry,' Buffy thought.

Spike, apparently having had enough of being ignored, took that moment to grab Sam's shoulder and pull her away from Buffy. "What she needs...is Me! I know how to–"

Spike's tirade was interrupted by a meaty sounding 'Thunk' Buffy glanced up at his face just in time to see his look of astonishment for just a bare moment before he disintegrated. The otherwise silent crypt echoed with the rasping, hissing noise of a vampire's demise.

"You killed Spike," Buffy whispered in stunned disbelief.

"He was already dead, Buffy." Sam explained, sounding quite reasonable.

"Well, that's true–" Buffy said, feeling absolutely nothing at his end. "Still...I needed–" she started to explain as the emptiness in her once again made itself known.

Sam interrupted her, crouching down in front of her and saying, "You need touch, you need warmth, you need to be filled up–"

The warmth that had been gradually rising inside of Buffy suddenly blazed; undeniable, powerful heat ran through her. 'Yes! Yes I need that!' her mind screamed. Her head began to nod as though of it's own volition. When she opened her mouth to speak, a low, guttural moan was all that came out.

Sam closed the remaining gap between them, her hands quickly skimming over Buffy's body, stripping her of the armor and gear she was wearing. "You are a goddess, Buffy!" she whispered. "Your body should be worshiped! Nothing cold or dead should ever be allowed to defile you!"

"Yes, please!" Buffy managed to whimper.

It seemed as though only a moment passed before Buffy found herself naked and draped over Spike's 'couch' with a beautiful, equally nude woman hovering above her, braced on her hands and knees.

"You are so beautiful Buffy!" Sam whispered, her lips so close that Buffy could feel the warmth of Sam's breath against her face.

Buffy parted her lips, intending to reply in kind, when Sam's mouth descended upon Buffy's, taking away her ability to speak.

'Soft! Warm! Ungh, good!' Buffy's mind was reduced to monosyllabic grunts of surprised pleasure as Sam thoroughly, though gently, explored her mouth. A moment later, Sam lowered her body onto Buffy's so that they were pressed together head to toe. The Slayer groaned at the sensation of Sam's hot skin covering her like a living blanket. She found that her arms had instinctively wrapped around the lissome woman to pull her even closer. 'Oh yes! More heat!' her mind cried.

The tactile vibrations running through Buffy's body were so intense that she cried tears of joy. 'Oh my God! This is what I've been missing! I can feel her touching me everywhere!'

When Sam broke the kiss, panting for breath, Buffy began whispering "Yes! Yes!" over and over, glorying in the return of sensation.

Sam must have taken Buffy's chant as encouragement, because she slid down Buffy's body until her face was level with Buffy's chest. The Slayer's breath caught as she anticipated the feel of Sam's warm mouth on her engorged nipples. Buffy was surprised when instead, the brunette pressed her breasts up and together like a pushup bra. Surprise gave way to a gasp of pleasure as Sam began to nuzzle Buffy's chest like a cat; rubbing her face and hair over stiff nipples, crinkled aureole and the soft surrounding flesh.

"Oh my God!" Buffy panted. "That's...so–" her thought was interrupted just then as the wet heat she had been expecting long moments ago suddenly registered against her hypersensitive flesh.

"Aahhh!" Buffy shouted, arching up against Sam's mouth.

Incoherent with desire and pleasure, Buffy lost track of things until she felt Sam's face nuzzling the skin of her tummy as she descended to the junction of Buffy's thighs. Already wetter than she'd ever been with Spike, Buffy felt herself overflow with desire.

Raising her head to look down her body, Buffy gasped harshly at the sight. Sam's ice-blue eyes seemed to radiate lust and desire as she met the Slayer's gaze. 'Glad I had the full Brazilian!' Buffy thought absurdly as she watched Sam's open mouth descend upon her most intimate flesh. 'Nothing to block the view...'

Buffy's thoughts were once again driven into incoherence as her new lover laved, tickled and explored like no one had ever done to her before. Buffy's eyes were closed so tightly that she saw bright lights and intense colors washing over her awareness. When Sam slipped two fingers inside the Slayer, it was enough to push her over the edge.

Even though Buffy's eyes snapped open, all she saw was a bright, white light as she screamed through her release.

After only a bare moment's respite, Sam renewed her activities with even greater vigor, shattering Buffy's consciousness into a thousand sharp fragments.

Buffy awoke to the sensation of warm, naked flesh spooned up against her chest and legs. 'What happened?" she wondered for just a second before memories began to rush back into her mind.

'I remember! Oh God, do I remember! The feel of her tongue...the smell of her when I went down...The look on her face when she...I can't believe it! She tasted *so* sweet!' Buffy felt her face grow hot as the thought came unbidden to her mind, 'Oh Willow, I so get it now! Girls...*way* better than boys! Oh jeeze, I can't believe I just thought that!'

Another series of memories ran through her head and Buffy surged up to a sitting position, shouting, "Oh no! Oh God, no!"

Sam sat up abruptly next to her and Buffy turned to the other woman with a horrified look on her face.

"Buffy, what is it? What's wrong?" Sam asked, concern and a little fear written on her face. "Do you regret–"

"I had sex...with...with Spike!" Buffy cried in disgust. "Oh, Eww! Eww! What the hell was wrong with me!?" she buried her face in her hands and began to weep bitterly.

Buffy felt Sam's arms wrap around her, and felt the other woman's warm breath against her ear as she whispered, "Shh, shh now. It's alright, Buffy. It's over now."

"No! I...with Spike!" Buffy lamented, her stomach clenching painfully.

Buffy felt warm hands guiding her head against the soft skin of Sam's breast, followed by arms wrapping her up once again as Sam rocked her gently.

"I think you were still in shock, Buffy." Sam spoke in a calm, compassionate voice. "Your friend Willow told me that she pulled you out of heaven–"

Buffy stiffened. 'God, I can hardly even remember it now,' Buffy thought sadly.

Sam continued speaking, apparently choosing to ignore Buffy's flinch. "Of course I can't even begin to imagine what that was like...it had to be a huge shock though–"

"It's so cold here–" Buffy whispered. "I remember being so warm–"

"I think you never got over the shock Buffy," Sam said sympathetically.

Buffy pushed away from Sam and looked her directly in the eyes. "I think...this is the first time I've felt warm since I–" her voice cracked and she hesitated.

'No! Dammit, no more cowering away from it!' Buffy yelled at herself. Mentally stiffening her resolve just as she physically stiffened her spine, Buffy continued, "...Since I got yanked out of wherever I was, woke up in a coffin and had to claw my way out of my own grave."

Sam didn't have to say a word; the compassion on her face and the tears in her eyes conveyed the message.

"Thank you Sam. I...I might never have been able to snap out of it if you hadn't–" Suddenly Buffy laughed out loud.

"What?" Sam asked with a puzzled grin.

"Sorry, it's just...I was going to say, 'if you hadn't killed my dead lover and seduced me.'"

Sam chuckled a bit at that, then sobered and looked intently back into Buffy's eyes.

'She's so beautiful,' Buffy thought wistfully.

"Buffy, it was my deepest honor...and pleasure...to help." Sam said with quiet passion.

Unable, and unwilling, to stop herself, Buffy leaned forward and kissed Sam. Though the kiss was slow and gentle, Buffy felt her passion begin to stir anew. She was just reaching to cup Sam's breasts when the door to the crypt slammed open once more.

"Alright Spike, or should I say...Ulp!" Riley's booming voice cut off with a strangled gulp.

Buffy snatched her hands back to her sides, and then grabbed the blanket that had fallen mostly off of her and Sam and yanked it up to cover her breasts.

"Buffy? Sam?! What the hell?" Riley sputtered.

Seemingly unconcerned, Sam leaned back on her elbows, not bothering to cover her naked chest. "What's up Finn?" she asked casually.

Riley gaped silently for a moment and then stepped forward, bellowing, "Where's Spike?!"

'Oh God, this is like a nightmare!' Buffy thought, closing her eyes in embarrassment.

Sam's voice was laden with humor as she quipped, "Take another step and you'll be standing in him."

"What?" Riley asked, sounding confused.

Buffy had to strangle a laugh. 'My God, what did I ever see in him?' she wondered, not for the first time. 'It certainly wasn't his brain!'

"On the floor, Rye. The gray pile of dust there at your feet?" Sam said, speaking slowly and deliberately, as though to a small child.

"So...you dusted Spike, destroyed the eggs and decided...what? It was celebration time?" Riley asked, sounding exasperated.

Sam's voice was instantly serious, "The eggs are here?"

Buffy put two and two together and said, "Spike was 'The Doctor'?"

"According to my sources, the eggs are in a cave under this crypt," Riley explained as his eyes began to scan the room. "Oh, and yes Buffy, your pet vampire is...was the dealer who was going to sell the eggs."

"He was hardly my pet!" Buffy said, feeling both embarrassed and outraged.

The feel of Sam's hand on the bare skin of her back kept Buffy from blowing up at her ex. 'Gee, I guess I can hardly be mad at him...I'm the one who just got caught cheating with his wife...' she realized, her temper cooling rapidly.

"Rye, be a dear and take care of those eggs while Buffy and I get dressed, would you?" Sam jumped up and stretched mightily, apparently unconcerned about her state of undress.

Riley was still standing in place, frowning. His eyes did have a certain gleam in them though as he raked them up and down his wife's lithe body.

Her arms still extended up and over her head as she reached the zenith of her stretch, Sam grinned wickedly and said, "The sooner you get it done, the sooner we can get back to base and I can start 'making it up to you'."

Buffy was shocked when Riley snapped to attention and then darted over to a hole in the ground near the crypt's back wall, leaping through it without another word.

Buffy stared at Sam with wide eyes. "Um...huh?" she asked dumbly.

Sam apparently knew what she was asking, because she explained while picking their clothes up off the floor. "Riley knew I was bisexual when we married. He's too straight-laced to join in the fun, even though I made it clear before I said 'I do.' that he would have to put up with occasional dalliances on my part." She paused and looked back at Buffy, saying, "Only with women though–"

Buffy chuckled weakly. "Uh huh, of course." 'God, I'm such an idiot...' she thought, suddenly ashamed of her behavior.

"Hey!" Sam said suddenly. She placed the pile of Buffy's clothes and gear next to the Slayer and took Buffy's face in her hands. Looking intently into her eyes, Sam said "Last night wasn't some fling for me to get my rocks off. I meant what I said! Buffy you're like this larger than life, living legend...You've stopped the world from ending again and again! You've died twice and came back for more!" She leaned in and gently kissed the Slayer before adding, "I am...so incredibly grateful that I could be here for you when you were hurting! I'm not kidding when I say I'm honored that you would trust me with something like this...it means a lot to me!"

"I believe you–" Buffy whispered. "It's just...I've never been good with...casual sex, I guess."

Sam let go Buffy's face and smiled. "Believe me, Buffy. Nothing about tonight was casual to me. Think of it as more of...more like a healing experience. You were hurting, and I wanted to help."

Buffy nodded thoughtfully. "A healing experience. A healing experience with orgasms." Immediately she thought, 'Jeeze Buff, Anya much?'

Sam laughed. "Oh yeah! Many, many orgasms."

Buffy surprised herself when she didn't immediately drop the subject. "So many! You're really, *really* good at...you know–" she trailed off, her momentary bravado dying quickly.

"Thanks!" Sam replied earnestly. "You're no slouch though! You had me forgetting my own name there a few times!" she said happily.

Buffy blushed. "Uh, really? I mean...thanks, thank you...Can I just say that this is a weird conversation for me?" she said bewilderedly.

"Ok, no more sex talk," Sam said, chuckling as she got dressed.

'Clothes! Clothes would be good,' Buffy thought shaking off her momentary stupor.

After dressing in silence, Buffy couldn't help voicing her curiosity about one last thing. "Uh, Sam?"

"Yeah Buffy?" Sam replied as she finished securing her body armor.

"What did you mean when you said you had to 'make it up' to Riley." Buffy bashfully asked.

"Oh, well...like I said, Riley doesn't play well with others, so I act out his favorite fantasy for him after the nights that I 'step out'."

"Oh," Buffy said.

Sam laughed out loud, "You want to know, don't you?"

Buffy shook her head, "No, it's ok–"

Sam put her hands on her hips and stared at Buffy, smirking.

'Ignore her...ignore her,' Buffy told herself as she finished donning her gear. Finally, when she was done, and Sam was still staring at her, Buffy capitulated. "Ok, so I'm a little curious–"

"He has me dress up as a cheerleader, then I have to do a 'go Riley, you da' man' cheer. After that, I get on my knees and beg him to let me suck his cock." Sam said without a trace of embarrassment.

'Oh God!' Buffy thought, suddenly unable meet Sam's eyes. She felt her face grow unbearably hot as she blushed.

Sam's voice carried the smirk that no doubt graced her face. "Yeah, I figured that was you."

An hour later, Buffy was standing outside her house, saying her goodbye's. A chorus of 'Bye Riley, Bye Sam's sounded out around her as the two black-clad demon hunters were winched into the hovering chopper. Buffy watched, feeling mixed emotions at the sight.

'I'll miss her...still, it's probably better this way. She was awesome, obviously not the settling kind, though...and how weird is it that I'm standing here thinking about having a stable relationship with another woman?!'

Buffy turned to walk into her house, following Dawn and the rest of the Scooby gang. 'I'm going to have to give this some thought...' she pondered.

Buffy entered the house as Dawn and Willow were discussing Riley's new wife.

"She was so cool!" Dawn said excitedly. "A regular girl, but still all 'kick-ass demon fighter' just like Buffy!"

"I guess. She did seem pretty...energetic" Willow answered.

Her mind was too busy 'pondering' to censor her mouth as Buffy interjected, "You have *no* idea, Will! She's...she's like the freaking energizer bunny...and she tastes–"

Buffy's eyes widened as she realized what she had just said. 'Oh no...' she thought in horror as she looked up to see the reaction to her slip of the tongue. Dawn's face was screwed up in a look of confusion. Willow and Xander were displaying dropped jaws and shocked disbelief. Anya just looked smug.

The ex-demon leaned over to her boyfriend and loudly whispered, "See Xander? I told you her breath smelled like pussy! Can we go have orgasms now?"

The end.


End file.
